Bear Hunting

Larry was excited about his new rifle and decided to try bear hunting.
He travelled up to Alaska, spotted a small brown bear and shot it.

Right after, there was a tap on his shoulder and he turned around to see
a big black bear.

The black bear said, "That was a very bad mistake...that was my cousin
and I'm going to give you two choices . Either I maul you to death or we
have sex."

After considering briefly, Larry decided to accede to the latter
alternative.

So the black bear had his way with Larry.

Even though he felt sore for two weeks, Larry soon recovered and vowed
revenge.  He headed out on another trip back to Alaska where he found the black bear and shot it dead.

Right after, there was another tap on his shoulder. This time a huge grizzly bear stood right next to him and said, "That was a big mistake, Larry.
That was my cousin and you've got two choices.

Either I maul you to death or we have rough sex."
Again, Larry thought it was better to cooperate with the grizzly bear than be mauled to death.

So the grizzly had his way with him. Though he survived, it took several
months before Larry fully recovered.  Now he was completely outraged, so he headed back to Alaska and managed to track down that grizzly bear and shot it.

He felt sweet revenge for a few moments but then there was a tap on his
shoulder.

He turned around to find a giant polar bear standing there.  The polar bear looked at him very sadly and said, "Admit it, Larry; you don't come here for the hunting, do you?"